Sunday, October 09, 2005

Sometimes He whispers.....

Sometimes He whispers, sometimes He shouts.  No, I am not referring to my husband.  He doesn’t shout all that often, unless it is at the TV and sports are on.  The “He” that I am talking about is God.  When I began my walk with God, and became born anew in Him, I started to learn how to listen.  Sometimes I didn’t want to….sometimes I still don’t.  The times when I don’t are when I find that he seems to shout the loudest.  

Sometimes, the loudest messages come on a whisper.  After I got hurt, and was floundering so, wondering what in the world I was going to do with the rest of my life, God whispered.  But boy oh boy it was loud and clear.  To this day I am trying to fulfill the instructions from that day.  He said it could be done.  I have put my faith in Him that it will.  That is how Ozark Body & Bath came to be a reality from a 10 year old idea.  He told me now that I was hurt, that it was time to follow that dream.  I am so grateful that He gave me that message that day.  I have loved every minute of my soap making journey and my soap making business.  I have met some fabulous folks along the way.  

Now, I have taken up a few new hobbies.  Ones where I can be restful and meditative while I do it.  Knitting and spinning for me bring me quiet relaxation.  They let me step away from the chronic pain that weaves its way through the fiber of my daily life for a moment and just get into the rhythm of the motion of “doing”.  I enjoy being alone in my thoughts with my knitting.  As my hands carry the yarn from one stitch from the next, I often think about how God has carried me through life from one hardship to the next.  For often times, my life has not been an easy one.  I have many times called upon him to carry me when I was to weary to walk even one step further.  Never was I refused.  I was always placed back on solid ground once again.  I think were it not for Him and His grace that sometimes I wouldn’t be here today.

I think that I am here for a reason.  I know that my journey is not through.  I had thought once, that my purpose in life was gone.  But once I got out of the darkness and depression of the aftermath of my life altering injury, I could see that I was so very wrong.  God gave me two new sons to raise. He knew I wasn’t done at two children, so he needed to give me a couple more.  He gave me special kids.  Kids who perhaps might just have needed the kind of person that I am to make them whole once again.  I think its working.  
I can see great changes in both of them over the years and they have made positive steps towards healing their pasts.  

I am glad that one day, long ago, I made the decision to give my life to God.  If I hadn’t, I don’t know where I would be today.  Or even if I would BE here today.  I didn’t get here by myself, that’s for sure.  I had help from a way higher power!!

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