So many people keep asking me if I have a blog. I finally got tired of saying no and decided to “just do it”. Why not? I love reading other people’s knitting blogs! Maybe someday, someone will actually enjoy reading mine too! I dunno……that will be down the road a while I am sure.
So I am sure you are curious about the title of my blog. “She’s Come Un-Spun”. I had been tossing titles around in my head for the blog and all I kept coming up with were those cutesy, smarmy little advertising phrases that make you want to stab your eyes out with your needles. Then, I remembered a fabulous book by Wally Lamb that I read called “She’s Come Undone”. Well, of course I couldn’t copy that title and sleep at night, so I did the next best thing. I bastardized it to fit ME. Because yes, dear reader, 2 years and 5 months ago, my life DID in fact come UN-SPUN. Irreversibly, out of control, no brakes, stop-the-ride-I-wanna-get-OFF type of unspun.
Imagine yourself minding your own business, doing your job, which you absolutely love. (How rare is that huh?) And some stupid, moronic, twist of fate changes everything. That’s pretty much what happened to me. I got hurt while working. Segue forward to now, and life as I had known it is over. My career is over because of the injury. Working a J-O-B is over because of the injury. I went from being an in charge, take control; got my shit together woman, to a woman who can barely tolerate keeping her own home clean to my own personal standard of perfection. I was going NUTZ.
But oh boy, apparently GOD had other plans for me that I did not know about. I guess I should have consulted with him a little better before I decided to choose a career in law enforcement huh? On the other hand, why did he let me survive the police training academy AND graduate 3rd in my class if he wasn’t planning on me doing this for awhile? Cuz I gotta tell you, those 12 weeks ALETA were a bitch. I thought for a while there that I was dead, dying, and beyond all salvation. And then, I did what all those who survive do, I found my inner warrior and not only survived but I surpassed and out did everyone except 2 people in my whole class. For an old broad I didn’t figure that was too darn bad. The day I graduated was the single most proudest day that I ever was of me…..ever. But anyway, back to GOD and his cosmic sense of……what is it??.....is it humor……timing…….I don’t know for sure what it is, but you get bet your lucky penny that when I see him I am going to ask. Cuz I sure wasn’t done saving the world yet.
So, to get past the morbid, crushing, deep, dark, black depression that gripped me like primordial ooze and penetrated me to my very soul, I knew that I had to start moving. I had to start listening to the “message”. See, once upon a time, about 10 years ago, I had this vision of what I once wanted to do. That involved a small body and bath shop with handcrafted soap, custom blended body products and the whole shebang. But ten years ago absolutely was not the time for that. 10 years ago, I was trying just to keep my kids feds since my alcoholic ex-husband didn’t seem interested in doing his part of that parental job. So anyway, that dream go put way on a back burner.
BUT, little did I know that HE did not forget. He brought that dream out, dusted it off, and placed it before me. I heard the message just as clear and loud as a telephone ringing on the table beside me. The message said “NOW IS THE TIME FOR THE DREAM TO BECOME YOUR REALITY.” Heh! Oh yah? Ya think? Well, well, well.
Now it had been at least 9 years since I had even made any soap from scratch. I didn’t even know if I knew where my original recipe was! So I dug around and lo and behold there it was. But you know what? Somewhere in the meantime, a wonderful thing had happened to the world’s technology. The INTERNET grew and grew and grew and grew. So I wondered if there was anything about soap making on the internet. Whooo boy what a dumb question! I did my research (read: hours and hours), I learned more about oils and ingredients and lye and store bought soap than I even knew I wanted to know. I made batch after batch after batch after batch of wonky looking soap. Yep, I was out of practice.
My poor friends and relatives, they got so much BAD soap. Now they are rewarded with wonderful, FREE soap to make up for all those traumatic times. My business grew and it was good. But……..it wasn’t enough.
As if……….are we ever satisfied??
Well, before, in my past life, I used to crochet. Miles and miles. I have an UGLY afghan and a beautiful one to prove it. I have my own Christmas stocking that I crocheted. But my burning desire was to KNIT. My great grandmother used to knit. I can remember to this day. I wasn’t lucky enough to inherit one of her pieces, but what she left in my heart stayed over the years. The love for fiber, needles and the serenity that knitting only can bring.
You see, I still have this restlessness inside of me. At times I feel as if I might burst if I don’t DO something with my life. I told my husband that sometimes I feel like I am not contributing at all. Of course, I realize that is ridiculous, because he could not do the work he does if he had a wife that worked full time outside the home like I used to work. Especially the weird shifts that police officers work. And when he was gone to Salt Lake City for 2 weeks last year?? Oh my, well he just wouldn’t have been able to go. So I know I have value.
Well, as a side benefit to my soaping, I hooked up with a soaping forum. On that forum I have met the most fabulous group of women I could ever know. They come from all walks of life and are scattered across the country. The most fantastic thing about these women is that we are “family”. Yes, I can hear you muttering…..its an internet forum how can you be friends and say you are family with people you haven’t even met or don’t even know?? Au contraire my gentle readers, some of us have met and those of us that haven’t me, a lot of us have spoken on the phone. We have shared our lives through pictures and stories. We meet in chat almost nightly to relax and catch up and just generally have a girl talk session. We believe that we could solve the problems of the planet if someone would just listen to us!
This soaping forum has women of other talents besides JUST soaping and making toiletries. We also cook, and craft, and make jewelry and we KNIT. WHOO BOY do we ever knit. There is one particular woman on the forum who also is on my knitting forum who is my knitting idol…goddess of thread extraordinaire……I truly believe she could knit a silk purse out of a sheep’s ear. So this woman, who goes by the name of Silver, graciously offered to teach a KAL one day of socks. Whooot! I thought all right! I am gonna knit and she is gonna teach me!!
HAHAHAHAHA……aside from almost stabbing my eyes out, I wasn’t anywhere ready to attempt socks. So I backed up about 10 paces and got back to the basics. I finally, finally, finally mastered basic knitting. I AM A KNITTING FOOL!!!!!! I have learned SO much this year that I have been knitting that after I get my Christmas projects done, I think I’m gonna go back and try those darn socks again!
Oh, but do you think that was good enough? Of course not. You see, something bad happens when you knit. Something really bad. Mothers all over the nation should warn their daughters about this. When you become a serious knitter, you become a dreaded fiber ‘ho. You go into yarn stores just to fondle. You save your money for just one more skein. You surf the internet dreaming about patterns you can knit with what yarn. And slowly, you build a stash. And you begin to learn about the different types of yarn. And you learn about how yarn is made. Then it happens……..well it happened to me. I don’t think it happens to everyone, but it got me bad. I must learn to spin. I must make my own yarn. That’s all there is to it.
Tomorrow I am going to shave a Llama. Have I got it bad or what?????
Oh, welcome to my blog……if you made it this far there is hope for you! I hope you stick around. My life is nothing if not very very interesting!!